Nikki Giovanni - Cotton Candy on a Rainy Day 汉译

Don't look now

I'm fading away

Into the gray of my mornings

Or the blues of every night

Is it that my nails

keep breaking

Or maybe the corn

on my secind little piggy

Things keep popping out

on my face

or

of my life

It seems no matter how

I try I become more difficult

to hold

I am not an easy woman

to want

They have asked

the psychiatrists  psychologists  politicians

and social workers

What this decade will be

known for

There is no doubt  it is

       loneliness

If loneliness were a grape

       the wine would be vintage

If it were a wood

       the furniture would be mahogany

But since it is life   it is

       Cotton Candy

         on a rainy day

The sweet soft essence

       of possibility

Never quite maturing

I have prided myself

On being in the great tradition

       albeit circus

That the show must go on

Though in my community the vernacular is

       One Monkey Don’t Stop the Show

We all line up

       at some midway point

To thread our way through

       the boredom and futility

Looking for the blue ribbon and gold medal

Mostly these are seen as food labels

We are consumed by people who sing

       the same old song          STAY:

                                          as sweet as you are

                                          in my corner

or perhaps             just a little bit longer

But whatever you do      don’t change baby baby don’t

                                          Change

Something needs to change

Everything     some say        will change

I need a change

       of pace    face        attitude and life

Though I long for my loneliness

I know I need something

Or someone

Or ……

I strangle my words as easily as I do my tears

I stifle my screams as frequently as I flash my smile

       it means nothing

I am cotton candy on a rainy day

       the unrealized dream of an idea unborn

I share with the painters the desire

To put a three-dimensional picture

On a one-dimensional surface

                                                                      1980